As a veteran online dater (I’m not sure whether to be proud or ashamed of that!), I can say that I’ve seen some interesting profiles. Here are some major no-nos that every guy should avoid in his profile (if he wants to attract girls, that is!):
#1 – Don’t post a shirtless picture.
Unless you’re trying to attract the kind of girl who will only love you for your body and not your personality, keep your shirt on. “But e,” you say. “My face looks great in that picture, too!” So crop it so we see just your face.
- #1a – Don’t show anything else.
Obviously most dating services won’t accept these kinds of pictures, but once you take things to email, resist the urge to send us pictures of you that leave nothing left to the imagination. Please. We’re begging you. We laugh at you and then you are relegated to the “Funny Things to Show to Friends” folder.
#2 – Take off the CAPS and pleez use spelcheck and Correct grammers.
I know, we live in an age of textspeak and lolcats. I, too, am guilty of starting an IM conversation with “oh hai!” While that’s all fine and good with your friends, it’s not the best way to impress someone who doesn’t know how smart you really are. Writing just isn’t your strong suit? Hire me to help you out. (Click the Hire Me link under Topics on the left.)
#3 – Don’t skimp on the details.
Nothing was more frustrating than seeing a guy with a killer smile and good stats whose profile says “I don’t know what to write in these things. Email me if you want to talk.” or worse yet, “My coworkers say I should try this, so I figure why not. Here I am.” Some girls will want to dig deeper and email you, but most will move on to a better profile thinking that you’re not the communicative type.
#4 – Don’t overdo the details.
The flip side of #3. If your profile is longer than 3 paragraphs, you’re most likely going to lose a girl’s interest and she’ll move on. Even if you’re a fabulous writer, you have to leave some things to talk about during your first, second, third, twelfth date…
#5 – Don’t be too specific in what you want.
“My ideal woman is shorter than 5’5″, has red hair, green eyes, and wears a single digit jeans size.” That’s super. What you should really write is, “I probably won’t like you, so don’t bother emailing me.” Yes, we all have our “type”. Mine is tall, thin, geeky, and preferably redhead. But I didn’t put that on my profile. Because like most people, it takes more than just a body to attract me to someone. In the “About My Date” section you can check off your preferences, but the text of your profile should be about attracting a certain personality type to email you. Once you have the list of emails to choose from, then you can look for your petite, emerald-eyed redhead.
If you feel you’d like the eHarmony approach (without the eHarmony rejection!!) try match.com’s Chemistry service for help finding the match that’s best for you: