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No wonder harpies are so angry.

21 Mar By 7 Comments

I was flipping through my boyfriend’s Monster Manual a month or so ago and was utterly appalled by this picture:

Angry Saggy Harpie

I mean, do you see the sag going on due to the lack of proper support? No wonder harpies are so irritable! A good bra is worth its weight in gold pieces, as any girl (geek or otherwise) can tell you.

I’ve decided that in a future D&D campaign, I will play some sickeningly Good character whose mission in life is to knit bras for harpies. I imagine it would look something like this (pardon my awful Photoshop skills!):

New and Improved!

What do you think? She looks so much happier, doesn’t she?

Filed Under: Dungeons & Dragons / RPGs, Geek Life Tagged With: , ,
About e

Since 2008, E. Foley of Geek’s Dream Girl has been helping geeks from around the world find love. She writes amazing online dating profiles for her fellow geeks and guides them through the perilous waters of the dating scene and out the other side. She's totally proud to report that she's even caused a couple geek weddings! By day, she is the Copywriter at ThinkGeek, where her greatest challenges are coming up with enough Star Wars jokes that only reference the good movies and remembering which supers are Somethingman, Something Man, or Something-man. She lives in Maryland with DaveTheGame, her adorable cats, Mr. Peanut & Don Juan, and Titania, Queen of the Cocker Spaniels. (Email e, or follow @geeksdreamgirl on Twitter.)

Comments

  1. Mel says:
    21 March 2008 at 12:04 am

    Cross-Your-Harpy 18-hour?

    Better trademark that now!

    /nod

  2. e says:
    21 March 2008 at 12:13 am

    Indeed! Someone needs to design the logo for that brand!

    Anybody better at photoshop than me? (Then again, EVERYONE is better at Photoshop than me!)

    Email your harpie bra related shots (PG please!) to e @ geeksdreamgirl.com.

  3. Yax says:
    21 March 2008 at 4:52 pm

    Poor harpies!

    It seems logical now that they are pissed off. My girlfriend refuses to jog because “it just encourages gravity”. Wing-flapping sure seems just as gravity-enducing.

  4. e says:
    21 March 2008 at 5:15 pm

    Jogging is indeed a dangerous activity for breasts. Wing-flapping I think would only make matters worse. Then again, all the flapping would work the pectoral muscles…. wouldn’t it?

  5. Bilbo says:
    24 March 2008 at 12:39 am

    Excuse the ignorance, but don’t sports bras take the gravitational risk out of jogging?

Trackbacks

  1. The Wizards Gods are Listening! says:
    29 May 2008 at 8:19 am

    [...] In this post, I lamented the fact that harpies have saggy breasts (and consequently attitudes!) due to lack of proper support. [...]

  2. A Laugh and a Lesson: “My Girlfriend Gave Me Harpies” : Geek's Dream Girl says:
    26 February 2010 at 11:19 am

    [...] course, he ended up at this post: No wonder harpies are so angry. In it, I explain that any female with lack of proper breast support is going to be pretty [...]

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