Top 10 Reasons Why She Doesn’t Respond to Your Email

You’ve followed all of my advice. You spiffed up your profile, you have good pictures posted, you’ve got your Custom Searches made, you’ve been spending 15 Smart Minutes a day reading profiles and writing emails, and what do you have to show for it?

Nada.

What gives? Here are the Top 10 reasons why she hasn’t responded to your email:

10. She doesn’t have a paid account.

  • Seriously, there are a lot of girls who post a profile but don’t have paid accounts, so while they can see they have an email, they can’t read it.

9. She’s totally forgotten she has a match.com account or her life is hectic at the moment.

  • You can check on her profile page to see when she last logged in. If it’s been more than two weeks, make a note of her username and check later to see if she’s returned.

8. She’s semi-seriously dating someone.

  • It’s not so serious that she’d take the profile down, but serious enough that she’s taking a break from checking her email.

7. You clearly did not read her profile because your lifestyles clash.

  • You work from 10 pm to 5 am, she works from 2 pm to 10 pm. You won’t even get to sleep at the same time!
  • Your idea of a great time is white water rafting and she is the kind of girl who never gets her hair wet unless she’s in the shower.

6. Your email fast-forwarded to the future.

  • Girls don’t want a marriage proposal in the first email, nor do they want to hear about the beautiful babies you would make together.

5. Your email implies that the only thing interesting about her is the fact that she is hot.

  • Do we like compliments? Yes. Do we like being told we’re beautiful? Certainly! Is it creepy when we get emails that say, “U R hot. Email me.“? Yes.
  • Instead of going that route, find something specific to compliment her about (beautiful hair, bright eyes, friendly smile), and then move on to talking about things she DOES, rather than is.

4. You have no pictures posted. Or, after viewing your pictures, she’s decided that you’re not her type.

  • Take down the “myspace self-portraits” and the pictures of you with alcoholic drinks, other women, or your car.
  • Clean up nice and have a friend snap some pictures of you in good lighting. One good picture is better than 6 mediocre ones.

3. You embody one of her deal-breakers.

  • She is interested in men 25-35 and you are “a young 52.”
  • She only wants to date other Christians and you are an atheist.
  • You have two kids from a previous relationship and she doesn’t want children.

2. You sent the same cut-n-paste email to every girl and it’s THAT obvious.

  • We can tell, you know. We can also tell when you use the same cut-n-paste email, but you paste in a few different words like an online dating email MadLib. Get creative and show us you really WANT to get to know us, will ya?

1. She doesn’t know why she doesn’t like you, but she doesn’t.

  • Girls are picky. Sorry!

Got a great profile and getting lots of initial contact but no lasting relationships? Why not hire a Geek Girl to perch on your shoulder and help you take those winks to the next level?

About e

Since 2008, E. Foley of Geek’s Dream Girl has been helping geeks from around the world find love. She writes amazing online dating profiles for her fellow geeks and guides them through the perilous waters of the dating scene and out the other side. She's totally proud to report that she's even caused a couple geek weddings! She lives in Maryland with DaveTheGame, her adorable cats, Mr. Peanut & Don Juan, and Titania, Queen of the Cocker Spaniels. (Email e, or follow @geeksdreamgirl on Twitter.)

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