Diary of a Drow, Day 20 (morning)

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OOC: We last left our adventurers in the room at the bottom of the prison of the giant. They had released and defeated the fire elementals and had to go to sleep because their players had wasted most of the gaming session arguing about level-appropriate encounters. (Don’t worry, the argument continues in this session… and is given some ground to stand on!)

Last night wasn’t very sleep-conducive, to say the least. The gnoll and the naga were arguing on whether or not to untie and “walk” our prisoner so his muscles didn’t weaken too much. The gnoll was growling menacingly at the human and caused him to wet himself. Eventually, the gnoll allowed the naga to partially untie the prisoner. They spent most of the night in a three-way conversation translating Common to Halfling to Giant and back again.

The Sulatar and the kobold were having storytime in the corner with the book. The kobold is pointing at words and pronouncing them in Draconic very slowly and the Sulatar was repeating them. It was the most ludicrous thing I’d seen in a while – the idiots teaching the idiots?

I finally drift off to sleep and when I awaken, the Sulatar is gazing at himself in a mirror and combing his hair. I notice him cast something on himself. Improved Salacious Deeds, perhaps?

Hello,” Salacious says to the room. “I’m Vin.”

The naga’s head pops up and looks at him. “I’m Gorgoroth, priest of…” something. I don’t really care what he’s a priest of.

You fight good,” the gnoll grunts. “Thanks for coming. Let’s go kill the thing.”

I have an idea,” Salacious goes on. “The real enemy is the giant. The elemental forces are not good or evil by themselves.”

An odd thought for a Sulatar. Not that it makes me trust him any more.

We point out that the elemental was trying to reach its master. We can’t risk that happening by releasing the giant first.

Hakim summed it up perfectly: “A devilsaur is not evil, but I’m not going to offer it mangoes.

Our plan is to repeat what we did last night with the other three rooms, resting between fights.

It could have been a justice system… or philosophical reasons...” Salacious tries to reason.

“Dryad said kill them,” the gnoll points out.

I toss Salacious an orb. “Go on and get Earth and bring it to us while we do Water and we’ll make Mud, how about that?” He says he’ll go do that if I hold my breath.

“You’ll need another mango,” the gnoll tells Salacious.

We move to the room where the Earth elemental is trapped and the gnoll pops in the orb.

“In five seconds, the elemental will be free…”

I think I made out the word five,” says Salacious. His language acquisition skills are just astounding.

Earth ElementalWhere is Master?” the elemental asks. It is large, spikey, and brown and surrounded by four smaller smooth brown elementals. The smaller ones move forward immediately and try to hit those in the front of our party. (This is why I stay towards the back.) The kobold throws us a blessing and then cowers in a corner.

The smaller elementals do not put up much of a fight. Now that my bow is restrung, I land a few good shots, including one perfectly aimed shot. The small elementals crumble into pebbles strewn across the floor. The larger elemental is seriously injuring Name and it shakes the ground on occasion, causing members of the party to fall to the ground. Name is struck again and is bleeding out on the ground. Hakim shoots arrows at the elemental, which seem to bounce off its hard exterior. Salacious shoots black energy from his fingertips and pulls a wand from his belt and hits the large elemental with a spell.

It turns and glares at him. I am gleeful. In my glee, I do not notice the elemental shaking the ground and I fall. Bah. I get up and throw an axe at it, but miss. Salacious shoots more black energy at it and it rushes towards him. Hakim jumps out of its way. Salacious is pinned against the wall and the elemental pummels him hard.

I pull a mango from my bag, lean against the wall, and take a bite. Then I lob the mango at Salacious’ head, missing by a hair. It splats against the wall behind him. Damn, so close. The elemental misses Salacious, punches the ground, and falls. Salacious runs to the other side of the room and hits it with another spell.

Master will kill you all!” The elemental cries.

The naga draws himself up taller. “Not if we do first!

I have no urge to get anywhere near this creature. Everyone that is hit bleeds profusely, and I’m not about to take that risk. I cast Faerie Fire on it instead, giving it a nice purple glow. It charges towards Salacious, who seems to be the only one of us doing damage to it. I pull out my Morningstar and smack the elemental as it passes. The vibration from the impact makes my hand sting. Salacious is hit and falls to the ground.

Don’t you die on me!” the kobold cries. I’m not sure who he’s talking to.

Salacious stands up and shakes his wand, but nothing happens. His eyes widen in fear and he shakes it again and again. The naga finally lands the blow that crumbles the elemental to the ground. Salacious blasts the rubble with both hands, looking extremely pissed off.

The party is worn out and everyone but me has suffered some sort of serious injury. It strikes me that this would be a good time to kill Salacious with a well-lobbed mango, but seeing as he was the most useful member of the party for this battle, I decide he should live, at least until he is no longer useful to us…

OOC: We spent all night on one encounter. Yeah. All but one of us are level-adjusted (two drow, a naga, gnoll, shifter paragon). Hakim is the only one who is actually level 6. So um, there was much grumbling at our DM. I think we were hoping to kill more than 5 things in one day… especially since they were supposedly the lesser monsters in the prison! Hopefully the next two elementals will not be quite as hard!! Hint, hint. Hint. I’m talking to you, J.

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Since 2008, E. Foley of Geek’s Dream Girl has been helping geeks from around the world find love. She writes amazing online dating profiles for her fellow geeks and guides them through the perilous waters of the dating scene and out the other side. She's totally proud to report that she's even caused a couple geek weddings! She lives in Maryland with DaveTheGame, her adorable cats, Mr. Peanut & Don Juan, and Titania, Queen of the Cocker Spaniels. (Email e, or follow @geeksdreamgirl on Twitter.)

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