This comic probably gives you a clue as to what I’m suggesting, but let’s go back in time and I’ll tell you the whole story…
I’ve been in Orlando since late 2001 and have had my share of dating adventures. I’ve dated some great people, made some great friends, and sifted through hundreds if not thousands of “meh” profiles.
After my last relationship ended, I was back on match.com seeing what I could see. There were the same old faces that were on match every time I search for the intelligent set. There were a few new ones, but nothing was panning out.
I was telling my tale of woe to my friend Maria one night when she asked me if I had heard the story of how she met her husband. She told me how she had similar problems with match.com in town, so she decided to do something totally out-of-the-box.
She set up a custom search with everything set to “perfect man” standards. Then she extended the search radius to the entire country. “At the very worst,” she said, “I’d end up with some cool friends that shared similar interests!” But she ended up meeting Russ, who was living in another state at the time. They dated long distance for a year and then he moved here, they got hitched, and it’s been bliss ever since.
So I figured, hey, what can it hurt?
I put together my perfect geek boy list. I narrowed my normally broad age range down to closer to mine and set the height at 6’0″ or taller (sorry shorties, tall is sexy!). I also required that he be Never Married, have at least a Bachelors degree, and an income equivalent or higher than mine. (This indicates he has a career, not just a job.) Bonus points if he was turned on by brainiacs!
The first time I pulled up Mutual Matches, I got nothing.
Yep, nothing. But let me fill you in on a secret – match.com’s search functionality is not bug-free. When I returned the next day and did the same search, I was greeted by a list of geek boys meeting all my crazy criteria. Tons? No, but hey, I set the bar high!
I sent out a few emails to the ones who caught my eye and within a couple weeks, I was talking regularly with a redheaded programmer from Detroit. We were both still semi-seriously dating folks in town and griped about similar problems in our respective dating pools.After a while, we realized we liked each other a whole lot more than just internet buddies. I flew up there on my Christmas break and the rest is history!
Like the cartoon above, long distance does suck pretty hard sometimes, but we are hopeful that eventually we’ll manage to live in the same zip code.If you’re having similar problems in your hometown, give it a shot! You never know, you might find the geek of your dreams!
About e
This post is very reassuring to me, as I’m in the process of getting sucked into what may become a long distance relationship. Nice to know that it can pay off!
Forte – My biggest advice for LDR’s that start online – meet in person ASAP, otherwise you risk being pulled into a fantasy that may or may not pan out in the real world.
Absolutely, just under two weeks until we’re meeting up and not a day too soon.
Sometimes the LDRs work, sometimes you meet up with a huge old fat dude that you thought you were in love with. Trust me, one of these days Ill tell that true story in a blog. Not yet done being traumatized by it.
This was a great read. thanks!
December´s last blog post..Women are easy, believe me.
@ December – It’s all about webcam.
Then you’re sure you’re getting the geek you want.
I know this is an old post, but I set up the Dream Girl search in match.com and after a month, the search still hasn’t found any that matches the criteria. Does that mean my dream girl criteria is way too restrictive? Should I keep hopes up that one day my dream girl will appear, or try to find a way to relax my criteria?
@Jason -
It may mean you’re too restrictive, but also remember that your “Ultimate Dream Girl” search is just that – a dream, an ideal. It is very possible for there to be few matches (or none if you’re in a small area). As e says here:
But it’s a starting point. Be sure to follow the rest of the articles, and start making that search more realistic:
Part 3: The Realistic Search
And just for good measure:
Part 4
Part 5
.-= Graham´s last blog ..Damn you, Dave! You and your… logic… =-.
@ Jason – I should seriously start paying Graham for beating me to my own comments 90% of the time. He’s absolutely right, of course. The dreamgirl search is designed to be super-restrictive and come up with very few results. It’s one of those one in a million kind of things. When I had mine up, I got 5 guys total (ever – and this was open to the whole country!). Two of them I wasn’t interested in (even tho they matched up by the stats), one fizzled out, and one of them was Matt, the GeekBoy I dated for a little over a year.
Keep hopes up that the dreamgirl will appear, but have your other searches ready because sometimes that dreamgirl is a little off from what you think you want.