…things started to pick up a bit after that…
Bachelor #11
Hey how are you doing ma’am I am a 44 year old white irish catholic kid from ca now living in — north area near —- I am five seven little bigger than med build short thick dark brown hair blue eyes nice smile non smoker drug free light drinker clean I am very sarcastic outgong and playful I have a couple of degrees and work as a crop consultant I also vol for two search and rescue teams I love to play tennis bike ride play putt putt indoor soccer, fish go to amusement parks right go carts play air hockey hike take walks ride bikes and much more FYI I liked your picture and your dog looks a lot of fun single never married live alone
Can I buy a period? Please? This is the most obnoxiously hard to read “paragraph” I’ve ever seen!
Bachelor #12
Hi there!My name is D——.I recently went back to college to enter the medical field.I’m excited to start towards a new fullfilling career.I enjoy the outdoors,being active.I am in good shape,have an athletic build.I really like to laugh and be a free spirit.I’m interested in a mature,independent woman that can relax and be herself.I think this could be you!I’d like to hear from you soon.Bye
Cut-n-paste. Bye.
Bachelor #13
Hello Greek Lady,
I am an artist/art teacher and moving to ———– to hopefully teach Art. I am moving from —————. I plan on applying to Law School. I don’t have a picture on this new computer, sorry. I do have a webcam though. I am a very nice person who would like to talk with you about Austin. I do know the town somewhat, but not well enough to know where I should buy a house. If you would like to talk my cell number is ###-###-####. I will be visiting ——- frequently in the next few weeks and perhaps we could meet for lunch, maybe ———- or PF Changs. Let me know if youre interested.
M.
GREEK LADY? GREEK LADY? Ok, the rest of the email is fine…. but there’s a big difference between Geek and Greek. Unless you’re a Greek Geek, I suppose.
Bachelor #14
I am a geek, and I’ll proudly admit it. What kind of geek are you? I will gladly tell you more about me if you’ll return the favour.
British spelling? I can forgive that. He seems okay, but offers no other information other than he’s a geek.
Bachelor #15
Hello There my name is C——- iam 29single love the out doors love kids live on a ranch so i like the out doors i dont know what elesa u want to know so all u hav to do is ask ok
My kingdom for someone who can spell and has good punctuation!!
e is out of town from June 12 – 28. Established comment writers are pre-approved, but if you’re new to town, you may notice a slight delay before my code monkey approves your comment. Please be patient and I’ll see you when I’m back from vacation!
About e
Reminds me of an email I got a long time ago (2004 to be exact, thanks gmail!). A bit of background: At the time, I was using Hot or Not to find dates. This chick was one of my “double matches” and we talked for a while… As far as I can remember, she’s the only person I’ve ever stopped talking to because of her writing. I don’t have the rest of our correspondence, but here’s the last thing she sent me:
“You a fucking ass hloe! i know i spell porly. you know u could have just said it to me straght. you fucking pussy! what ever. un eduagated prick!”
I don’t remember why I told her I wasn’t interested anymore… But I’m pretty sure I didn’t say anything inflammatory. I actually don’t know how she figured out my reason… I just checked my livejournal archives, and I didn’t post anything about her except that last email.
Bachelor #14 was in the second hour too. Seems like someone is copy & pasting and forgot which geek he sent it to.
Either the bachelor is… or e is…
I still feel my paladin senses tingling when you do these things. But then its still funny and informative.
Sorry for all you paladins out there, but this is all for the Greater Good.
*hears echoes… “The Greater Good…”*