OMG, You’re Naked! Or, Online Dating Privacy

People worry about privacy when it comes to  online dating.  This statement counts twice when the person in question has a high profile job.

So what do you do when you want love in your life but can’t risk the wrong people getting the wrong idea?

As a former high school teacher, I have been there.  Here’s what I can tell you about privacy, and lack thereof, when it comes to online dating.

Real Life Concerns

If your job puts you in the spotlight in your community, you may be wary about putting out a website advertising your need for a partner.

When I was a teacher, I was always waiting for the day when a student would come in and say, “Hey Ms. F, I saw your match.com profile last night!

You know what?  It never happened.

I also never bumped into a former student while shopping in the adult superstore (though I did learn a former student is now an adult film star, but that’s another story).

Recently in my hometown of Charlotte, North Carolina, several teachers were disciplined for material they had posted to Facebook.  The infamous “morality clause” of the teaching contract was called into play and there was a general uproar on the internet about first amendment rights, privacy, and the expectation of teachers to be role models for America’s children.

It’s Up To YOU To Prevent Forest Fires!

My first thought?

Why on EARTH did they have their profile visible
to the whole Charlotte network?

Privacy is your responsibility, folks.

If it’s something you worry about, there are steps you can take to ensure that your dating profile is (mostly) only seen by potential partners, not business associates, clients, or students.

Options to Keep Your Profile Private

Don’t Date Online

That’s the easiest one.   Date the old fashioned way, or hire a private matchmaking service.

Don’t Post Your Photo

Go the incognito, secret agent man way.  They can’t prove it’s you without a picture – can they?

There’s a fine line between being private and obscuring important facts about yourself.   It can be walked – very, very carefully – and you can be successful.    Sadly, few inexperienced writers can make it across that tightrope.

Use A More Private Online Dating Service

Services like eHarmony and Chemistry only show you matches that are appropriate for you.  This eliminates the chances of being randomly discovered by a bored high school sophomore on a Saturday night.  It does not eliminate the chances of being discovered by a coworker or client who fits the same demographic you are seeking to date.

Wherever You Keep Your Dating Profile…

Unless you are using a dating website for consenting adults, keep your dating profile grandma-friendly.   You can discuss all that other stuff once you’ve gotten to know your potential partner better.

Another thing to remember – depending on where you call home in the online dating world, your dating profile may have a cozy home on a server somewhere long after you’ve stopped using it.

Tread carefully – on the internet, nobody knows you’re a dog, but you leave pawprints wherever you walk.

About e

Since 2008, E. Foley of Geek’s Dream Girl has been helping geeks from around the world find love. She writes amazing online dating profiles for her fellow geeks and guides them through the perilous waters of the dating scene and out the other side. She's totally proud to report that she's even caused a couple geek weddings! She lives in Maryland with DaveTheGame, her adorable cats, Mr. Peanut & Don Juan, and Titania, Queen of the Cocker Spaniels. (Email e, or follow @geeksdreamgirl on Twitter.)

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