A common complaint that I’ve heard from men is that they don’t receive reply emails from ladies.
“Why do they even HAVE a dating profile if they’re not going to write back?”
There’s no one answer to this question, but here are a few that I know are true.
The Nice Answers
She Doesn’t Have A Paying Account
If you’re on a site which requires a paid membership to read emails, there’s a good chance that she hasn’t even seen that you emailed her. There’s a little alert that tells her she has email, but unless she ponies up the cash, it will remain a mystery.
She’s Afraid to Write Back
You may be the perfect guy for her. She might just be terrified at the idea of meeting someone from the internet. She could be reading your email daily, staring at your profile pictures, sighing, and saying to herself, “No, no… I couldn’t. What if he’s an axe murderer?”
The Not-So-Nice Answers
She’s Not Interested
She’s read your email. She’s just not interested and is either too lazy or too scared to write you a courtesy Thanks, But No Thanks email.
She Made The Profile For Laughs
I watch the Twitterverse on a variety of online dating topics. There are tons of tweets from girls who say they’re making an online dating profile for laughs, just to see how many guys email them. Some of these girls even have boyfriends! Sad, but true.
Moral of the Story?
First contact emails should be short and sweet for a few reasons. One of the major ones is that you don’t want to waste a ton of time crafting a giant long email to someone who may not write you back.
If you don’t get a reply, don’t fret. She’s not the one for you.
Happy dating, geek friends!
About e
I wonder many of those under the “She Made The Profile For Laughs” heading aren’t even female at all, but males pretending to be females. It’s certainly common enough in roleplaying environments but at least there it’s a given that anyone can pretend to be anything they want. It wouldn’t surprise me if for some people, that kind of thinking carries over into dating websites where you’re supposed to be who you say you are.
P.S. The site has put the same ugly avatar on all of the replies I’ve posted. Is there a way to pick a different one?
@mwalimu – Gravatar.com is where you can assign yourself a picture. Those without a gravatar get a random monster icon.
Thank you. I’ve registered and uploaded an icon which I see the site is already using on my past posts.
@mwalimu – yes, and it’ll work on any Gravatar-enabled blog.
Men often don’t reply to emails either…probably for the same reasons you’ve listed. Although I find that the guys tend to send more “winks”, “nudges” or whatever the one-click show of interest is on each dating site. Could it be that they’re afraid of the “no-reply” syndrome? Or maybe they’re just less email articulate than us gals? I’m not sure about that, but I do know that I’m much more likely to respond to someone who took the time and effort to construct a sentence or two for me!
Sharon´s last blog post..To Click or Not to Click!
To be honest, from our research we find that the main reason that women don’t reply is because they are inundated with emails, and they basically have far too many to reply too.
If you wait for a girl to contact you first you will obviously have a good chance to get into conversation. This relies on a good profile of course, it sounds like E. Foley can help with that!
I believe one of the reason is because most women do not trust anybody on the internet. How can you reply to a person that you don’t even know?
@ Bi – In that case, why do online dating at all?
No sense in putting up a profile if you have no intention of replying to any emails.
They just want to have fun and are not serious in looking for ideal partner.Not only women, men also do the same thing…
A lot of guys post such crappy profile that if I was a woman I would’nt reply to their e mail either.
I think that they get overwhelmed with emails and, quite frankly, probably aren’t interested in 90% of the emails they receive. Most men will copy and paste their email messages so it sounds generic and uninteresting. What they need to do is stand out by personalizing the email. The woman you’re emailing should feel like you are actually interested in getting an honest response and not that she’s email number 225 of 500.