Comments on: Dear Anon-O-Box: I’ve Done Some… Things…

By: Matt Savage

Matt Savage — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 17:13:31 +0000

Though I can't much relate with SOL on a truly bad history, I have certainly made some poor past mistakes myself. As others mention above, it seems that necessary thing is first to forgive yourself. From there, I'm not sure, but I would imagine if you lived your present life as honorably as possible that someone would surely be available to you. .-= Matt Savage´s last blog ..Vegetarian Dating Options? =-.

By: Frank

Frank — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 14:13:57 +0000

SOL:

I’m currently dating a girl which I disagree with her past life (ALL OF IT), and though the thoughts of who she was haunt my dreams every night, I can see the growth in her, and I love her for that.

I don’t know if the relationship will survive for much longer, but one thing Im sure, I would have loved to never know what I know now. We all have skeletons, no reason to put them out there in detail…

Whoever got hurt with your erroneous deeds should get more thought that this fictional girl you are looking for… make amendments with them first (if you haven’t yet) and then life will show you a future.

Good luck.
.-= Frank´s last blog ..Business Sustainability (VIDEO) =-.

By: Dice Girl

Dice Girl — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 22:42:32 +0000

@Spenser- I complete agree that you have to forgive yourself before you can expect others to forgive you (think off it as a small twist on the idea you must love your self…).

Now I will be honest, I am very very hesiant when it comes to someone’s past. I will admit that most of that fear comes from people in my family, but I think the important thing is to show that you have accepted what you did, know that it was wrong and move forward from there. I think Y is right that it will be difficult to deal with but don’t count people out (I know more than my fair share of very understanding geek ladies).

By: Spenser

Spenser — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 16:57:12 +0000

Obviously, I don’t know anything about SOL, but I’ve given romantic partners with sordid pasts the benefit of the doubt a couple times and both times, to a certain degree, had it come back to bite me in the ass. Personally, I’m done with sort of person, but there will certainly be people willing to look beyond past misdeeds. The real challenge isn’t for them to overcome their judgments, it’s for you, SOL: Don’t let whatever happened happen again. That’s the only way you can really show you’re sorry.
.-= Spenser´s last blog ..Review: Kobold Quarterly #11 =-.

By: Mike

Mike — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 15:36:54 +0000

This reminds me of one of my favorite fictional character archetypes: The Unforgivable Hero. Think about Clint Eastwood in Unforgiven or maybe the Comedian from Watchmen (although I don’t think he was ever a real hero so he may be a bad example).

It also reminds me of the movie Crash.

Sometimes the most interesting characters are the characters who have done something so bad in their past that no future actions can make up for it – but it doesn’t stop them from trying. It’s probably a better definition for heroism than someone who feels that, if they’re enough of a hero, they will always be known as one. True heroism might never be recognized and is done knowing this.

That doesn’t help with this real-life situation, but it got me thinking a lot.
.-= Mike´s last blog ..Ration Tracking System =-.

By: bbaydar

bbaydar — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 14:06:06 +0000

Good advice, but total Geek failure for not quoting Roy Batty from Blade Runner.

Roy Batty: I’ve done… questionable things.
Eldon Tyrell: Also extraordinary things. Revel in your time.
Roy Batty: Nothing the god of biomechanics wouldn’t let you into heaven for.