Admit it: you have a bucket list or life list, some way to tally whether or not your life is going successfully. But do you have enough geeky activities and plans on it?
If not, here are a few ideas to get you thinking…
What to Know
Basic phrases in Klingon
You should be able to greet people, bid farewell, and casually remark that “today is a good day to die” in Klingon. If you haven’t checked this off your list yet, you can find instructions and pronunciation guides of all kinds online. Remember to use the phrases regularly so they’ll stay fresh in your mind. majQa’!
How to set up your computer and network
If you’re proud of your computer skills, you probably did this when you were eight. For the knitting, manga, or model geeks out there, this is still an essential geeky skill that people expect you to have. And it’s useful to be able to help that pretty girl or cute guy set up their new computer or home network, if you catch my drift.
The entire “all your base” script
Any geek should recognize this, and if you don’t, you need to learn now. Youtube can instruct you in the ways of this secret geek handshake. If you’re not sure if you’re among friends, blurt out, “All your base are belong to us.” If there’s laughter, you’re safe. If you get blank stares, edge away. Just beware… if you recite it too much around your friends, it gets annoying, and somebody might set up you the bomb!
At least one computer language (other than HTML)
You probably already know basic HTML, but don’t be lazy. Take the time to learn some computer language and you can impress employers, cute nerds, or webmasters at will. You might even be surprised at how useful it can be.
The basic plot of either Star Wars or Star Trek
How many times have fellow geeks started making red shirt jokes or quoting lines that made you stare blankly? It’s a really embarrassing feeling! Learn the plot of one… or both for bonus points and best results.
What to Do
Make or build something related to your main obsession
If you’re a gamer, have you ever built a gaming computer? If you love manga, have you tried to write one? If you play D&D, have you built your own fantasy world and campaign from scratch? Try it out! All of these activities are fun and will award you plenty of geek XP.
Go to a fan convention
It can be about Star Trek or Supernatural, Comic-Con or Anime North… as long as it’s geeky and you go, all’s fair. This is the ultimate experience in geekiness for many, though others say it’s the ultimate experience in overheating and fatigue. It’s still full of nerdy glee either way.
Drive a Prius and pretend you’re in White and Nerdy
Do I really have to explain this? If you’d prefer to avoid the experience, act out any other Weird Al video and you can still get the nerd cred. Tape it and post it on Youtube if you feel like risking being laughed at (a la the lightsaber kid), for the chance of bonding with other nerds.
Play Pong on the oldest (or newest) console you can find
Program your own if you want to really impress people. Otherwise, it’s still fair game if you’ve played it enough to describe how the game works. …you have played it before, right?
Back up everything
It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s… a public service announcement disguised as a life list item. Seriously, back up all your stuff – WordPress installations, games, emails, whatever you have that you’d miss. Make it a fun afternoon with some Pepsi and chips, music, and nerdy friends out to accomplish the same mission. Take pictures of all your external hard drives in a circle. Did I make it sound fun yet? Darn…
What to Be
The life of the party (even if just once)
You might be a socialite geek, or perhaps you’re a total introvert (I’m raising my hand), but this is an experience that’s bound to make you happy. Maybe it’s a geeky party or a “normal” one, but either way, having everyone hanging onto each word of your latest story is a pretty cool feeling.
A star in Japan
Maybe it’s harder to be one these days, but the Japanese are still generally fascinated by foreigners. Take full advantage of this status and use your gaijin power to wile your way into show biz. Appear on talk shows for them to laugh at your bad Japanese, or volunteer for game shows; voice over English in commercials or coach famous Japanese singers. It’s easy to be a star there, and you’ll be the envy of many sheltered North American geeks.
A cosplayer
If you haven’t done this yet, you need to. It’s a surreal and bizarre experience if you’re holding tightly onto your expectations or haven’t been to a convention before, but it can be hilarious and very gratifying when photographers rush to take pictures of your costume.
A podcaster
Chances are very good that you already have all the equipment you need. Maybe your podcast will only last for an episode or two, but it’s still pretty cool to be able to say, “Check out my podcast.” The public downloads podcasts… the geeky make them.
The proudest geek you can be
Yes, it’s cheesy. It’s also essential if you want to identify as a geek in public. Though the very g-word has shifted from having entirely negative connotations to having a kind of cool, chic air about it, it’s still important that we represent geekdom proudly!
Your List
So, what’s on your life list? Here are a few things on mine that inspired this post:
- Play a full board game of Sid Meier’s Civilization without sleeping.
- Visit Akihabara (in Tokyo).
- Build my own gaming computer.
Share your geeky goals and dreams! Don’t be shy, you’re probably not the only one who wants to do it.
About z
Hmm. I’ve built several gaming computers – check. visiting Akihabara? I would so love to… if there’s ever a way, I’ll be there. I didn’t know there even WAS a Civilization board game. Does the World of Warcraft board game count? I’ve never played that one to full completion (we usually do a “sudden death” PvP match about four hours in).
Two that I would add to the list: Attend a LAN party, and play an MMO with a group of friends using voice chat like Ventrilo. Both of these can lead to some hilarious times that will leave you rolling on the floor with laughter as the geeky comments fly left and right.
“Make someone go crosseyed talking about your nerdy hobbies” or maybe “Teach a non-nerd about your nerdy ways”? … I changed my ex from a trendy emo goth Depeche Mode listener into a hardcore trek nerd obsessed with all things Whedon in under 2 years… … … I’m slowly writing a thesis on the experience. *LAUGH*
Let’s see. I’ve got two of those in the bag, I’m close another two, and working on another. Unless we can include gaming conventions in the fan con category.
Let me add watching all of the Star Wars trilogy (either one) or LOTR in a single day.
I can’t help but be a little disappointed with this post – is geek culture so clearly defined that there can really be a list of things that geeks should know/do/be? Being a geek isn’t about Klingon or cosplay. It’s about liking whatever you like, and liking it however you’d like. You shouldn’t need to impress others, or do something you wouldn’t otherwise.
I admit, I’ve got a lot of these in the bag. But I’m not interested in some of them, and that doesn’t make me any less of a geek.
- Get paid for your geekery
I admit, this is one I already have in the bag, but I think it’s a great goal for every geek to have, even if it’s just on a small level. There’s nothing so sweet as getting paid to do something you love. With luck, you can make a career out of it, but even if it’s something really small and one-off, like small crafts on Etsy, a guest post on a blog, or helping someone set up a gaming computer, I think it’s a great feeling.
- Write a book… or at least come up with an idea for one
Note that this does not have to be a novel. It can be an RPG book, a collector’s guide, a self-help book for getting a geeky job, a self-published series of Doctor Who poems… whatever. I know that not everyone can get around to writing their magnum opus, but getting a great idea, writing it in your head… I think that’s a wonderful feeling in and of itself.
- Roleplay
We may take this as obvious, but let’s face it, there are plenty of geeks out there who have never roleplayed anything. So bust out the D&D, the White Wolf, the Shadowrun, whatever!
Wow, awesome ideas, everyone!
Ken: I’d count the WoW game, sure.
Here’s a picture I found of the Civ board game to give you an idea of how fun it looks… http://www.ogrecave.com/features/origins02/civ-big.jpg And I totally agree with the LAN party and Vent party ideas. So many fun times raiding other Vent channels– I mean, sharing laughs. 
Larry: Haha, major props to you, then! Sounds like a fun thesis topic, too!
Jordan: I think gaming conventions should be included, absolutely.
It doesn’t have to be a con for some specific event — just for whatever flavor of geekery you indulge in. Knitters can count knitting conventions (do those exist? They should!), and gamers can count gaming conventions. Oh, and I actually debated with myself about including a LotR marathon, but I was trying to keep the list short. 
ofthebad: Thanks for your comment! I didn’t intend this to be an ultra serious “if you don’t do these things, I’ma firing mah lazer at you” (sorry, couldn’t resist) list… more of a tongue-in-cheek look at the stereotypes of what geeks know, do, and are, along with some suggestions for things *most* geeks enjoy. If you don’t enjoy an activity, there’s no reason to do it!
m: I totally agree with you on all three ideas here! Thanks.