What if I told you there was a surefire way to increase the replies you get to emails you send on Match.com by 44%? And that this “trick” could be applied to plenty of other dating sites just as easily with similar results?
Don’t worry, I haven’t gone all sleazy pick-up artist on you. (You know how my lovely assistant J and I feel about those people.) But I am going to tell you a quick and easy way to make your inbox a little more full (or less empty, depending on how your experience has been).
It all started with an email. This particular guy noticed a trend and decided he’d email me to see if this was just anecdotal evidence or a real deal statistic in play.
Yeppers, my geek brethren are smart cookies. Y’all want data and well… I’m happy to dig a little deeper and get it for you. I emailed Colin Burns, the Social Media Manager at Match.com and posed the question to him. He ducked into the magical data mine at Match.com and came up with an answer.
You’d better get a pen and paper and write this on a sticky note. Attach it to your monitor.
OMG, STATISTIC!
If you send a first contact email to someone who has already scoped out your profile,
the response rate is 44% higher
than if you email someone who has not yet seen your profile.
Those people are sending a signal – they noticed you. They noticed you enough to click on your profile and read it.
Why didn’t they email you, then?
- They were too busy and planned to email you later.
- They were too shy. (Some people don’t send ANY first contact emails. Ever.)
- They thought, “He/she’d never go for someone like me.“
- They were confused by a part of your profile and decided not to chance it.
- They weren’t 100% sure about you.
- etc, etc.
Bottom line: They noticed you. On some level, your profile was intriguing to them. This is why you’ll have a 44% higher response rate rather than cold-emailing someone who has never seen your profile.
Do I mention I noticed they saw me?
That’s up to you. If you can bring it up in a way that’s not creepy (“Yo babe, saw you lookin’ at me. Now I’m lookin’ at YOU!”) or pathetic (“Um, so, I saw you looking at my profile but you didn’t email so maybe you’re just shy or maybe you got totally turned off by my profile. I hope it’s the former.”), then go for it.
But really, you don’t have to mention it. Just write your regular first contact email (click here for tips!) and send it off, knowing you have a 44% higher chance of getting a response. Pretty awesome, right?
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im not sure how helpful this is…I only really get viewed by people who probably saw me view them first and people who don’t fit my criteria at all
@Vash – Perhaps then your mission should be to make your profile’s first impression (the way it appears in search results) better.
Good info for sure! Here’s what I learned about winks btw: when I was dating I never responded to winks. I figured if he winked it was because he was lazy or casting a wide net.
My (now) husband winked at me and for some reason I responded. (Meant to be??) I asked him a couple years later why he winked and didn’t email. He said it was because he thought I was “out of his league.” Wow! Never thought of that! (Per your #3.)
You are right here: if they don’t email it doesn’t necessarily mean anything negative. If you’re interested assume it’s a positive thing and go for it. No sitting on your proverbial high-horse and getting all pissy about no email. S/he could be your future spouse!
@Bobbi – Your hubby is gosh-darn lucky you replied!!
I always tell my clients, even if you think the person is “too good” for you or “out of your league” you should email anyway because you never know. You can’t make assumptions about what another person may like or not like in a mate.
I agree. Getting back to people who either have browsed your profile or winked at you will get better results.
Seems pretty obvious to me. If either happened, it’s at least because the other showed interest to start with. As to why he/she didn’t go further and email, reasons are, as mentioned, various and many.
This goes to show that you’re always going to fare better if you’re more proactive and reactive…
I guess. it’s more like there just aren’t enough people who match in my area.
Another reason you might not have gotten a message? Writer’s block. Hits me all the time.
Also, there could be a problem with your profile. I run across so many profiles with “I like all types of music” or “I’ll try anything” with no further explanation of what activities she likes or something else completely generic. There needs to be something a person can use as a conversation starter! The worst is “I like to have fun!” That’s a problem. I hate fun. Kill it with fire.
Sorry about going into rant mode on the second paragraph.
Do you have Match’s customer care phone number? I got an unexplained login error message after 2 days for nice activity and pre-paying for the 6mos membership. Thanks!
@Daria – I’ve passed your email address on to the folks who run the Match.com Twitter account (via direct/private message). Hopefully they will contact you soon.
If you don’t hear back in a day, try this link: http://www.match.com/help/contactus.aspx?ct=1