Happy May!

Every month in 2012, I’m delivering tips, questions, and writing prompts to freshen up your dating profile and have you looking your best for the love of your life (or the love of the month, if you roll that way).

Big Tips For Every Dating Profile

Start with a bang! Folks on the internet are in a hurry and like to have things delivered to their eyes as quickly as possible, otherwise, they move on. If your first sentence or two isn’t gripping, they’re going to slip away to the next profile.

Have an interchangeable section of your profile.  If this happens to be the beginning of your profile, even better. Have parts of your profile that you can delete and replace with other information. This is where you can freshen up your profile for the month by shooting in some new words that will catch the eye of someone new.

Three Questions for May

Looking for inspiration to freshen up your profile so it says, “I’ve updated this recently”? Here you go!

• Got big plans to celebrate your Mom on Mother’s Day?
• Memorial Day is coming up. Have you (or your loved ones) served in the military?
• What piece of summer clothing are you looking forward to taking out of your closet?

Three Writing Prompts

Starting a new profile or re-writing yours? Here are some questions that might get your creative juices flowing.

• Every pet has a quirk that makes them unique. What does your pet do that makes him or her adorable?
• What is your favorite movie of all time? Can you recite it word for word? What makes it so great?
• Who is your personal hero? Is there someone you admire for their strength of character? Who is it?

Happy Dating, Geek Friends!

Remember that I’m here for you if you need any help with your dating profile.

Happy April! (How are your April showers?)

Every month in 2012, I’m delivering tips, questions, and writing prompts to freshen up your dating profile and have you looking your best for the love of your life (or the love of the month, if you roll that way).

Big Tips For Every Dating Profile

Start with a bang! Folks on the internet are in a hurry and like to have things delivered to their eyes as quickly as possible, otherwise, they move on. If your first sentence or two isn’t gripping, they’re going to slip away to the next profile.

Have an interchangeable section of your profile.  If this happens to be the beginning of your profile, even better. Have parts of your profile that you can delete and replace with other information. This is where you can freshen up your profile for the month by shooting in some new words that will catch the eye of someone new.

Three Questions for April

Looking for inspiration to freshen up your profile so it says, “I’ve updated this recently”? Here you go!

• Earth Day is coming up. How environmentally conscious are you? What do you do to help preserve our planet?
• April showers are here. What’s your favorite part about a rainy day? If you’re a daily exerciser, does the rain stop you or do you come back from your daily run soaked to the bone?
• What was the best Spring Break you ever had? What did you do? Who were you with?

Three Writing Prompts

Starting a new profile or re-writing yours? Here are some questions that might get your creative juices flowing.

• If you had to survive for a month on a particular type of ethnic food, what would it be and why?
• If you could give a TED talk, what would be the subject?
• What is the most valuable thing you own — but not because of its monetary value? Why is it so valuable to you?

Happy Dating, Geek Friends!

Remember that I’m here for you if you need any help with your dating profile.

Happy March!

Every month in 2012, I’m delivering tips, questions, and writing prompts to freshen up your dating profile and have you looking your best for the love of your life (or the love of the month, if you roll that way).

Big Tips For Every Dating Profile

Start with a bang! Folks on the internet are in a hurry and like to have things delivered to their eyes as quickly as possible, otherwise, they move on. If your first sentence or two isn’t gripping, they’re going to slip away to the next profile.

Have an interchangeable section of your profile.  If this happens to be the beginning of your profile, even better. Have parts of your profile that you can delete and replace with other information. This is where you can freshen up your profile for the month by shooting in some new words that will catch the eye of someone new.

Three Questions for March

Looking for inspiration to freshen up your profile so it says, “I’ve updated this recently”? Here you go!

• Do you celebrate St. Patrick’s Day? Do you wear green, drink green beer, or both?
• If you found a leprechaun’s pot of gold, how would you spend it?
• How lucky are you? Do you often win things, avoid the short straw, and end up in the right place at the right time?

Three Writing Prompts

Starting a new profile or re-writing yours? Here are some questions that might get your creative juices flowing.

• Do you want a match that share your faith? If so, write about why having a match that shares your faith is important to you. (If you are not part of an organized religion, be respectful of those who are.)
• If ________ (local establishment) closed, you’d be really upset. What would you miss about it?
• Everyone has a knack for something. What comes easily to you?

Happy Dating, Geek Friends!

Remember that I’m here for you if you need any help with your dating profile.

I’ve added “knitting geek” to my repertoire in the past couple years. A friend of mine is obsessed with Nyan Cat but there was very little in the way of knitted patterns available. So I designed one!

Photo by Michael Collins, www.collinspics.com

This pattern features Chunky Mochi Rainbow yarn, Rowan Drift (for the cat), and Knit Picks Palette for the toaster pastries. You’ll need size 10.5 needles (circular or double pointed) and size 2 needles (circular or straight).

It’s easy enough for a beginner knitter!

Fun and fast for an experienced one!

Also, I don’t mind one bit if you buy my pattern and then sell your Nyan Cat hats all over Etsy or wherever. Knock yourselves out, small knitting business owners!  Just don’t sell the pattern itself, okay?

Photo by Michael Collins, www.collinspics.com

Snag your pattern on Ravelry or right here. It’s $5 and I will be donating all proceeds of pattern sales to the Oldies But Goodies Cocker Spaniel Rescue. That’s where I found my dog, Titania. They’re a great group of animal lovers and I’m happy to support them however I can.

Remember, you are buying a pattern to make your own hat. The actual hat pictured here is snug on the head of my favorite coworker.

Originally published in the Geek Love Rules issue of the DriveThruRPG Newsletter.

Valentine’s Day is all love and fancy dinners when you’re in a relationship, but when you’re single, it’s a different story. It’s a day to complain of capitalism gone awry. It’s time to crow about Singles Awareness Day. It’s a day to lament that you’re “forever alone.”

Geek friends, let’s not do any of those things.

Instead, here are some simple ways to level up your love life. As with all strategy guides, some of these ideas may help you rack up achievements while others are things you may consider newbie knowledge. Take on the quests that work best for your character sheet and leave the rest for other adventurers in love.

1. Start a new activity with new people.

Expanding your social circle is a great way to meet that special someone. The wider your circle, the more connections you will have. If you’re looking for a woman and join a class that’s mostly guys, don’t fret; those guys have mothers, sisters, cousins, and even on-friendly-terms ex-girlfriends.

Check out Meetup.com for activity groups for everything you can imagine: dining out, comedy, foreign languages, writing, art, gaming, dancing, and more. Looking to learn a new skill? Your city or county recreation center may offer classes for both mind and body where you can meet new friends.

2. Let it go. Let it all go.

We often have excuses that we hold up as reasons why we’re single:

“I’m too fat.”

“I’m unemployed.”

“I might be moving next year.”

“I like being single. Really. I don’t care.”

“I’ll never find someone who will let me go to Friday Night Magic and play RPGs every weekend.”

Let it all go. Whatever your body shape, there is someone who finds that physique sexy. In this economy, everyone knows someone who is looking for work. Going to leave town? There is someone dying to start a new life anywhere but here. Best of all, there is a person out there who will love you even if you’re sorting a box of Magic cards in bed.

3. Winning the battle is not worth losing the war.

Often we feel that we have to hide our geeky side to attract a partner. And all too often, it works.

You can hide your geeky side and get married to someone who thinks you’re a “normal” person. All will go swimmingly until they realize you have a room full of just gaming supplies and you want to spend 6 hours of every Saturday slaying hobgoblins.

I can name several marriages that ended in divorce because one partner didn’t grok the other’s hobbies and tried to get them to quit their favorite pastime. Don’t settle for someone who doesn’t allow you the time to engage in the activities you enjoy.

Check out OkCupid.com and SoulGeek.com for the most geek and geek-friendly singles.

4. Real people are real.

We all have a perfect mate in our mind. They have a perfect body, they’re always gainfully employed, they always smell amazing, they cook like a 5-star chef, and they get dirty like no other. They will always understand you, always anticipate your every need, and always call you when you want to talk to them.

That person doesn’t exist. The most beautiful people get BO when they forget to put on deodorant. Your 5-star chef might suffer from seasonal depression. That financial executive that makes six figures could get laid off in six months. Most importantly, nobody is going to have the psychic link to your every need.

When you’re searching for love, focus on the big picture. What things are great about this person? What intrigues you about them? Can you see them as a friend, activity partner, and confidant? All of these things are reasons to say yes to a date (or a second date!).

5. Forgive and forget.

Imagine what life would be like if we could see emotional scars as clearly as we see physical scars. I’ll tell you this much: you’d see that we all have scars, even the people who you think have everything in life.

No matter what your history, you can find love.

No matter who you are (inside and out!), you can find love.

No matter what flavor of geek you are, you can find love.

Like all great games worth playing, the Game of Love balances risks and rewards, involves a dash of luck, and when you lose, you learn valuable techniques to improve your chances of winning the next go round.

…and you can’t win if you don’t play. Game on!

Happy February!

Every month in 2012, I’ll be delivering some tips, questions, and writing prompts that you can use to freshen up your dating profile and have you looking your best for the love of your life (or the love of the month, if you roll that way).

Big Tips For Every Dating Profile

Start with a bang! Folks on the internet are in a hurry and like to have things delivered to their eyes as quickly as possible, otherwise, they move on. If your first sentence or two isn’t gripping, they’re going to slip away to the next profile.

Have an interchangeable section of your profile.  If this happens to be the beginning of your profile, even better. Have parts of your profile that you can delete and replace with other information. This is where you can freshen up your profile for the month by shooting in some new words that will catch the eye of someone new.

Don’t worry about Valentine’s Day. Every single person knows that 2/14 is coming, so don’t stress about it or mention it.

A Tip for Those in New Relationships on Valentine’s Day

If you end up on a first date around V-Day, bringing a single rose is a nice gesture. Go for pink, which is generally considered to be less serious-romance than red. Or if your date has a sweet tooth, a small box of chocolates would also be cool. Sappy cards are right out.

If you’re in a new relationship (under a month), think about where you stand. If you’re in contact constantly and all lovey-dovey, then go for the traditional gift and sappy card. If you’re only seeing each other once a week or you’re not exclusive, a smaller gift is more appropriate.

Three Questions for February

Looking for inspiration to freshen up your profile so it says, “I’ve updated this recently”? Here you go!

• What do you love about Winter? Do you love warm wool sweaters, playing in the snow with your kids or dogs, going skiing, or just having an excuse to drink more hot cocoa?
• What’s your favorite way to spend a snow day?
• What are your plans for the leap year? (Hey, it’s a whole extra day!)

Three Writing Prompts

Starting a new profile or re-writing yours? Here are some questions that might get your creative juices flowing.

• What’s the biggest leap of faith you made that was totally worth it?
• If you could take a weekend class to learn something new, what would it be?
• What scent reminds you of home? (Either your childhood home or current home.)

Happy Dating, Geek Friends!

Remember that I’m here for you if you need any help with your dating profile.

Thanks be to Thor and whatever other gods are controlling the weather; we made it to Ft. Wayne this year! It’s 12:33 am and since I haven’t gone to bed yet, I’m going to say it’s Thursday. (It’s technically Friday.) I wanted to be sure to get the news out to all the folks who don’t follow me on Twitter, so here’s the excitement of the first full day of DDXP and the introduction of the new edition of D&D.

Seminar:  Charting the Course: An Edition for All Editions

Loads of folks turned out for this! Of course, everyone is excited/interested about the new edition, but part of the good attendance also is because the seminars were nicely nestled in the time slot between game slots, so you didn’t have to choose between seminar or a game. Sweet!

The panel was moderated by Greg Bilsland and featured Monte Cook, Mike Mearls, and Jeremy Crawford of Wizards of the Coast. We were told we could blog everything except if someone took of their shirt. (Nobody did. Darn.)

Goals for the New Edition

The first thing they spoke about was what they were hoping to achieve with the new edition:

Monte wants to distill down what’s best about all the editions of D&D. He also mentioned the importance of the DM/player relationship; it’s a core part of the game that the player and DM should be able to communicate and be creative together. Also, fireballs.

Mike mentioned the importance of offering a wide variety of options for players to explore the world the way they want to explore. The shared language of D&D is also vital; keeping the culture and stories of D&D alive so that everyone can understand the story of the dread gazebo.

Jeremy wants the new game to be a toolbox for creating worlds and stories and hopes to see a rebalancing of the game between story & mechanics.

How It Will Work

Regarding how the game will be designed, Monte said that they are creating an underlying foundation or core game, which is D&D distilled to its essence. The core game can be played by itself, or you can build your own game using the different modules.

If you like a tactical game with lots of maps, miniatures, attacks of opportunity and the like, you can use modules to have that game.

If you want extensive skills and ways to customize your character, you can have that game.

If you want BOTH, you can have that game.

Modules & Balance

Achieving balance in a game that is so modular and flexible is a challenge, but Jeremy said that their vision is that the core game has seeds for each module. Using the modules just builds on that seed.

Monte’s example was of a fighter.

In the core game, a fighter does more damage and takes more damage than any other class. (As a fighter tends to do!)

If you prefer the fighter of 4e, where you have different fighting powers that allow you to move monsters around, push them, etc, there will be a module that will allow you to build that kind of fighter and play him at the same table as the core fighter. And they’d be balanced.

Monte also pointed out that as a DM, you could say up front, “I’m running X kind of game,” where X is tactical or X is political intrigue or X is exploration, and your players will then be able to create characters that will interact well with the world you want to build.

3 Pillars of D&D

Mike mentioned that they see the three pillars of D&D as Roleplay/Interaction, Combat, and Exploration. That covers about 90% of what goes on in D&D, minus the rules lawyering (that last one was pointed out by someone during Q&A at the end). They think a lot about how they can incorporate all the things that people want to do at the table, without making a rule for everything.

Monte recognized that some PCs will be good at exploration and not so good at combat, and vice versa. But it’s important to have a firm role for each class. If you have a player who just wants to kick ass, you can help that person create that PC.

Continuing on the classes discussion, Mike added that you can be a stabby rogue (more combat-heavy) or a sneaky rogue (more exploration heavy). Monte added that bards can still kick ass.

High / Epic Level Play

High level play was the next subject and Monte spoke about how fans of D&D often say that the game breaks at a certain level. That level depends on the edition and whether or not the game actually breaks or just becomes drastically different is up for debate. He said that 4e did a good job of making epic level play a different experience.

After admitting they haven’t done much work yet on high level play, Monte said they want to keep the game manageable at high levels. Maybe swap a bunch of abilities from low levels for a single, high-level ability and make things a little less complex. (As someone who hates having pages and pages and pages of character sheet, I can appreciate this.)

Of course, Monte added, there are things you want to do at high levels. You want to build your own castle, you want to have followers, you want to mix with royalty. These are things they hope to include. Mike added that you can still keep going into dungeons and killing monsters, or maybe gods.

Monsters

On to monsters! A lot about monsters ties in to player advancement. Monte said they’d like to keep the iconic monsters like orcs, goblins, kobolds and the like in the game for a long time. But they don’t want a level 1 orc, level 2 orc, level 3 orc. They want a group of orcs to be really scary at level 1 but still significant at level 8, albeit in larger numbers.

So instead of the fighter’s attack bonus going up, up, up every level, maybe it goes up every few levels and he gets other things at the other levels. So you can go back to that orc and know that this is the same exact orc that nearly slaughtered you at level 1. It gives you a bar to see your character advance.

One of the big pushes for the new edition of D&D is putting out an amazing DungeonMaster’s Guide. Mike had the best quip on this (it may be a paraphrase, live-tweeting is hard!): “We don’t need rules for everything. We need good DM advice.”  The DM plays such a huge role in how the game is shaped and if the system supports the DM with advice, it empowers the DM and makes the game better without adding more rules.

Playtesting & Your Feedback

Jeremy spoke a bit about playtesting, which has been going on for about 9 months. One thing that has come up again and again is how diverse people’s tastes are about D&D. Clearly, D&D players love their game, but everyone has a different idea about what the optimal D&D game is. This is something that’s gone all the way back to 1st edition.

When playtest feedback comes back, two people at the same table might have opposite opinions. Player A wants more combat while Player B wanted more interaction.

Monte said that because of these factors they’ve been focusing on the story of D&D. What is a fighter? What is a wizard? What makes the D&D wizard different from say, Gandalf or a spellcaster in Skyrim? Figuring out whether you get a +2 or +3 is the easy part, he said. Making a D&D ranger that feels like a D&D ranger is harder. Is that class more Aragorn or more Drizzt?

Monte said that the most important feedback you can give if you’re able to playtest the new edition is “Does this feel like D&D to you?” and “Does your class feel like it should?”

What’s Your Game?

The final question before moving into the audience Q&A portion was “What kind of campaign would you play in the new D&D?”

Monte said he’d use minis, but without the super tactical stuff, mostly just to visualize where things are when needed. There’d be lots of social interaction and exploration that relies on the ingenuity of the players, not die rolls. Players should think about where to search in a room, rather than just rolling a die for Search. He likes to reward his players for being smart.

Mike would start with the core game and then introduce modules later, adding them on a session by session basis. For example, if there was a large scale war, there’d be a module to help run that particular gaming session (or series of sessions). Mike doesn’t want a lot of rules, so he’d move modules in and out depending on what was happening for that particular game.

Jeremy agreed that he’d be the same as Mike. He doesn’t want to pick one game and stick with it. One night he’d do no minis, no die rolls, all talking. The next game might be the full on tactical game with the grid, minis, and tons of dice.

Audience Q&A

Q: To what degree will multiclassing be available? Or will that be mainly about skills/feats/etc?

A (Monte): We want both to be an option. So you could be a fighter that is okay at interaction. Or you could make a bigger commitment to multiclass.

A (Mike): The rogue could learn some stuff about Arcane Lore, but he wouldn’t be able to cast spells unless he multiclassed into Wizard.

Q: How does the new edition appeal to the new player who has no attachments to a previous edition?

A (Mike): The core will be simple enough for a newbie to try out because it focuses on the story first and interacting with the DM.

(E’s note: I started with D&D 3.5 and for me, looking at stat blocks and all the numbers intimidated the crap out of me. Coming into D&D with a more streamlined system – even say, Essentials – would have been easier. Of course, that’s me. Everybody is different!)

Q: What steps are being taken to give creativity back to the players?

A (Monte): Players can be empowered to have more answers to the DM’s question: “What are you going to do?” There are limitless answers and everything is very open now. Fewer rules means that the DM is empowered to handle imaginative players, too.

Q (ChattyDM): Will there be random charts and tables to help the DM?

A (Monte): Yes, for the DM who likes the chaotic nature of rolling to see what is living in the Temperate Swamp, you’ll be able to roll to find out. We don’t need tables for everyone, but the DM who wants them will have them.

Q: Say everyone shows up to the DM’s place and they want to kill shit, but the DM had planned a RP-heavy session… is it easy to switch up?

A (Mike): On the fly, it’s pretty easy to slide in a module to change things. Use minis, don’t use minis, big fight, little fight, no fight.

Q: How are you addressing the needs of organized play?

A (Mike): We’ll have an agreed-upon standard so folks know what they’re getting into for each session. There aren’t any specifics yet, though.

Q: Will one player really have fun with the stripped down rules while another one has a more complex character if they’re at the same table?

A (Monte): I ran a game for two 4e guys, two 3e guys, and one who hadn’t played since 1982. The 1e guy didn’t want a complex character sheet; he liked it simple. He wanted to know which orc to hit and then he hit it and had fun. With this system, if that guy eventually wanted a more complex character, we could change it for him and build one.

A (Jeremy): If you have two fighters, for example, one fighter might prefer to just do a lot of damage while the other might want to do less damage but be able to slide monsters around the grid.

Q: At higher levels, won’t the complex characters take way more time to do their turn?

A (Monte): We really want to keep combat moving quickly, so it will prevent that guy from spending 10 minutes on his turn.

Q: Do you think D&D will start to take itself too seriously?

A (Mike): I think D&D needs chaos in it, whether it’s a funny moment, something totally silly, or something very serious.

A (Jeremy): Art in the new edition will have a more grounded approach and PCs that appear real, not like superheroes. We have some halflings that look like they ate a few too many muffins and adventurers that barely survived their last battle. Very diverse art.

Q: How will the 3 pillars compete in this edition?

A (Mike): Balancing each class is important. We want to be sure that everyone at the table feels useful in some way and has something to contribute to the party.

The Playtest

Immediately after the seminar, I went to my mustering station and was assigned a table for the WotC Secret Special adventure, which was a playtest of the new edition core rules. I didn’t know anybody at my table (at least until Mike of SlyFlourish sat down!) but we were all excited to try the new iteration of D&D.

While waiting on our DM to arrive, I was scrolling through my Twitter stream and saw a tweet from Baldman Games that if any table yelled “THE BALDMAN RULES” they’d get Monte Cook as their DM. Since I hadn’t heard any tables yelling, I showed the tweet to my table and we all sounded the chorus. Sure enough, Monte himself came to our table to run our game!

If you follow me on Twitter, you may have noticed my silence for the next few hours. Here’s why:

1. Monte Cook. Srsly, do I need more reasons?
2. I couldn’t publish any crunchy details about the game, including any pics that might show character sheets. (Sorry!)
3. Our game was pretty freakin’ awesome.

Now, you don’t need your very own Monte Cook to make the new D&D great. Of course, having an awesome DM helps, but that’s true for pretty much every game out there.

Here are some of the things that struck me about this game:

There was a LOT of talk at the table. In character at times! I’ve never been at a D&D table where players were more invested in figuring out their next move.

On that topic, your next move isn’t on your character sheet. You don’t go paging through all your stuff thinking, “Well, I could Bluff this guy.” Nope. We were doing what we thought our characters should do, even if that involved our very NOT charismatic half-orc fighter trying to be a charismatic leader of a band of skeptical savage orcs.  Multiple times. In other games, it’s “Okay, who has the highest Charisma? You? Okay, you go talk to those orcs and get them to help us.”

Everything was fun and fast and fluid. I didn’t feel like the game got bogged down at any time during our session, even when we had a few rules questions for Monte. Things just happened and they flowed with the story and the story was awesome because we made it that way.

Thanks again for an awesome game Monte & friends!

…and thank you, intrepid Reader, for making it to the end of this marathon post.

Before you comment, understand this: This is my house and we play by my rules here. If you have negative things to say, they won’t make it past moderation. If you’d like to be a dick, please go do it elsewhere.

So we did it.

Lobster Stuffed With Taco Cake

Our inspiration came from these two sites:

• Lobster Cake
• Candy Tacos - we used chopped maraschino cherries for the tomatoes

We gathered up all the necessary ingredients and went to work making our delicious masterpiece. Enjoy the photos!

Completed Candy Tacos

Funny story. The middle of the cake didn't cook through, but turns out, that left a great hole for the taco.

All the cake parts assembled

A redonkulous amount of frosting hides all sins. (Book of Cake 3:14)

Of course, he needed a fondant hat and Twizzler antennae.

A close-up of the taco in his claw. Delicioso!

"Excellent, Sir. Lobster stuffed with tacos."

Love my crazy cake? Please pass it on to a friend!

(Sorry, Dave.)

I love Dungeon Bastard. His videos are well-written, impeccably done, and downright hilarious. If you don’t subscribe to his channel on YouTube, go do that now.

His newest “Ask The Bastard” is on Edition Wars and he echoes my feelings on the subject:

“Does it have dragons? Does it have dungeons? I want to play it!”

Here’s why you should kick those excuses to the curb –>

See that picture right there? That needs to be your motto.

New Year, New You?

Everyone starts the new year with aspirations. And we think, if I can just get those things on track first, then I’ll put up a dating profile. If I can just have this one habit cemented in my daily life, then I’ll go join that singles group. If I can just get to the gym every day for a month, then I’ll go to that mixer at church.

Why wait?

The biggest difference between you now and you two months from now is that you’ll be two months older and have two months more experience at being single.

Nobody’s Perfect

I’m certainly not perfect. I’m overweight. I have been overweight for the majority of my adult life. I suffer from depression and have occasionally thought I was “good enough” to go without my meds. (I am very happily back on them and plan to stay that way.) My previous career as a public school teacher left me in temporary poverty every August and with a small mountain of debt.

But I didn’t wait to find love. Neither should you, no matter how imperfect you may be.

Parts of You Are Pretty Awesome

Every time I interview a new client, I have an amazing time. I love learning about new people, “meeting” them via chat and getting to know what’s important to them and how they tick. More than that, I love being able to use my talents to write them a profile that really showcases what makes them pretty awesome.

You are a unique and awesome snowflake. There, I said it. There are things about you that are unlike any other person anyone has ever met. The way you smile, the way you laugh, the way you think, the things you’re great at, and the things you fail at hilariously. You are pretty awesome.

Who are you to deny your awesomeness to the world because of a few imperfections?