Geek’s Guide to Success in Online Dating

Image by Josh of Geek6.comGreetings, geek friend!

You’re probably wondering…

“Is online dating for me?”


“Can I learn to be a successful online dater?”

…or maybe you’re thinking…

“I’m a total geek. Can a geek like me get the girl (or guy)?”

The answer to all of these is a resounding YES!   Here’s a quick guide to online dating that you can use as a blueprint to success.

Whether or not your choose to hire us to help with your dating profile, join our geek matchmaking service and get our monthly newsletter, or coach you through the online dating process, we still want you to have the tools to succeed.


1. Be ready.
Know it’s not a last resort.

If you’re not emotionally ready for dating, work on yourself before you jump into the online dating system.   If you are depressed, hate yourself, or have anger issues, they’re going to come out in your profile and they’re going to ruin any relationship you start.  Love on yourself before you love on others – that’s what I say!

Resources about being in the right frame of mind for online dating:

2. Take great photos!

Flip through your Facebook and Flickr and find the most recent pictures of yourself – nothing more than a year or two old.  As we get older, we get attached to pictures of ourselves that we think look great… but in reality, they don’t look anything like our current appearance.  Don’t false advertise in your dating profile – you’ll get more second dates if you’re honest!

Here are some resources on great photos (and what to do if you can’t post photos):

3. Write a great profile.

After your photos catch the eye of that special someone, your words need to close the deal.  If your profile doesn’t convince them to email you, they probably won’t.   If your profile waves major red flags, it doesn’t matter how attractive you are, they’re going to run the other way!

Here are some resources for writing an awesome profile:

4.  Get Help, Get Critiqued, Edit!

Before your profile goes live, you’ll want to get an honest set of eyes on it.  Pick a friend who isn’t afraid to tell you the truth.  Or hire us.  Either way, you’ll want to be sure you’re sending out all the RIGHT messages and none of the wrong ones.

Here are some resources to help you identify and remove red flags:

5.  Choose your dating site(s).

With so many dating sites to choose from and advertisements on your favorite websites, TV, and radio… how do you go about choosing the best site for you?   Consider the following:  1) the size & reputation of the site, 2) the features of the site and 3) the subscription fee (or not!).

Niche sites (like geek dating sites) can be great, but realize you will only be seeing other geeks who 1) know that site exists and 2) have signed up for it.  It’s a much smaller pond, but you CAN catch fish there with some luck and patience.

Learn about various dating sites so you can pick the best one for you:

6.  Set up your custom searches.

Think online dating will take too much time?  Trust me, you can do it all in 15 minutes a day if you take an hour on the front end to set up great custom searches.

Resources to learn how to set up great custom searches:

7. Emails, Emails, Emails.

Emails are the part of online dating that seem to cause people the most headaches.  What do you write?  How long should it be?  How many emails can you send one person?  What if they don’t reply?  What if they DO reply? What if I get an email from someone I don’t like?

Never fear, answers about email are here:

8.  If necessary, perform an autopsy.

Sometimes, it happens to great geeks.  You’ve been trying and trying but getting zero results.  It’s time to take a good long look at your profile and your online dating strategy and figure out what needs changing.

Here are some things to ponder:

9.  Do or do not.  There is no try.

If you’re looking to be successful in anything, you have to work at it.   From freshening up your profile to reflect the new season, to understanding why girls do (and don’t) go for jerks, here’s some advice on how to keep on fighting the good fight.

Check these out:

10.  Get out on dates!

Lucky you, you’ve gotten a date!  (If you follow our advice, it will happen.)  OMG, DON’T MESS IT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!1!one!

Just kidding.  Really.  Take a deep breath, relax, and plan a low-key and fun outing where you can get to know each other.

Resources on dating in the real world:

11. Laugh.

Because if you don’t, you might cry.  Nobody wants to see a crying geek.  Besides, you’re so much cuter when you’re smiling!

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